We Need Some Psychiatric Therapy – Biti

via We Need Some Psychiatric Therapy:Biti | The Zimbabwe Mirror By Tendai Biti MP

Wananchi , It appears that the surreal has a natural affinity to Zimbabwe.

It does not matter whether its a super rigged election,a recycled cabinet ,witches caught in Budiriro, diesel that oozes from rocks , the slashing of rates and water bills,churches that get hijacked by bandits or drama in local authority elections.

There is always drama,an overload of it.Things do not happen in half measures.There is always the measure of exaggeration,of excess ,of drama and of the surreal.

A bit like Oscar Wilde s Dorian Gray,maybe The Great Gatsby.

I would say much much more like Shimmer Chinodya s Chairman of Fools.

This is a book about uncertainty and restlessness.A very educated but very alienated man ,based in a diaspora,which could be metaphorical ,who must find reconciliation with his surrounding.

So there is religion,binge drinking and eventually break down and incarceration in a mental institute .

There he is elected by the mentally challenged inmates as their chairman.Of course all the drama of these institutions is captured.Surreal happenings which can not be taken seriously.

We are clearly a restless nation,uncertain ,and chaotic .We are into the church,but many have also sunk into alcoholism and all kinds of vice.

But most importantly we are big fools .Don’t you sometimes wake up and really feel ,that empty feeling of nothingness.The absence of a center of gravity.

The teal feeling that we are idiots.And like Shimmer s fools we also elect a chairman.

Think of Comrade Chinotimba in parliament for instance,or comrade Mavhaire as Minister of Energy.

Speaking about parliament think of 280 men and women squashed in this little old colonial chamber that was originally designed to carry 80 people ,pretending to represent the people s will,making speeches no one listens too,making laws no one respects.

What a shame.

Our mad world is captured most dramatically by this thing called the Ministry of Psychomotor Monitoring .

Now if you needed any proof beyond reasonable doubt that we are a nation of idiots ,therein lies it.Quad Erranta Demonstratum.(QED)

Quite honestly to have a full ministry ,with a permanent secretary ,directors and senior management ,and then call it the Psycho motor ministry ,is sclerotic.

Indeed an absurd theatre of the absurd.Pretty much reminds of Petinah s stories in Elegy to Easterly.

Remember the one about the MDC.Not that MDC ,but the Mupandawana Dancing Champion.

A day is a very long period in Zimbabwe .There is always drama unfolding quietly or viciously .

There is always a tale to be told.There is always mirth ,myths ,satire and cynisms.

Just know how to scan it ,analyze it and decimate the same.

So today the big story was that of diamonds and US $ 6 million dollars.

I would like to say ,this is what we have been saying for years,or that this is just a tip of the ice berg.But I won’t state it today.

I am just concerned about the mental landscape of a nation.

The whole story reads like a poorly written novel.But the plot and sub plot are unambiguous and need no unpacking.

It’s story of brazen arrogant looting.But it’s a story with many characters and many extras,depicting the moral hubris of a nation .

I took my family to a healing dinner one night so soon after the election.When we came out of the particular Chinese restaurant a man was squatting in front of our car relieving himself.

We suffocated in disgust but the comrade remained unfazed and did not run away.When he was through he quietly raised up his trousers ,to cover his unclean bum and walked away ,whistling as if he was coming from a synagogue.

So that is the state of our beautiful country .

We need to return to legitimacy ,have sustainable elections and reconstruction of our economy and moral rearmament .Well and good.

Above all I suspect ,we need some psychiatric therapy.

We can only take so much.After all we are just tiny fragile human beings.




  • comment-avatar
    Takeiteasy Marcaves 9 years ago

    What is really happening to biti? Is he still normal? No he is not. And he now thinks that because he is mentally ill himself the whole nation is. Is that true? Biti are you finding it difficult to be just biti not Minister of finance? You are lucky my friend to at least an MP. You narrowly escaped the reality of us Zimbabweans to be still an mp. But let me rest assure you. In 2018 you wont come back, and thats when you shall know what to write for your country and what not to. In the mean time continue exposing yourself so that your party will at least continue to receive something from the westminister foundation. Do more writtings so that you become a Hero of self destruction. Meet you in 2018.

  • comment-avatar
    Lodza 9 years ago

    Biti, unorevesa hako. I found nothing much to celebrate pakabuda ma results. That emptiness was there. Still with me. Rega vambopembere tione. I remember when my daughter, then four, first crossed into South Africa. She marvelled, “Nyika dzeku South dzakanaka.” Idzo dzakanakawo zvadzo. We probably may not be where South Africa is today, but there is no reason why we should not be close apart from failed leadership. You tried Tendai. Thank you.

  • comment-avatar
    Jackson 9 years ago

    Takeiteasy Marcaves:
    Biti is very very normal. He is articulating in LITERATURE/POETRY form, the problems zimbabwe is in due to zanu pf win through rigging. He is talking about the ‘den of reptiles’ in which you are one of the occupants. Come 2018, with all possible rigging routes sealed,Tendai and his party will be the government, with a big bang. I hear that bang now from that far

  • comment-avatar
    Rwendo 9 years ago

    Let us add one other example of Zimbabwean other-worldly madness, my fellow countryman: the MDC snatching defeat from the jaws of victory in 2008.

  • comment-avatar
    Cuthebert Mithi 9 years ago

    Let it be known now that Takeiteasy Marcaves is either quite mad himself or horribly sclerotic. Biti is doing the most normal thing an intelligent human being could do. While the rest of us are bottling it in and pretending we still have a centre of gravity, he has chosen to bring it out and in the process help some of us heal from the shock of a stolen election.Poets and some daring columnists help society to see things in lighter way nomatter how grave reality maybe.It is one thing for one to have a different opinion from another, but it is a tragedy when one misses the point completely and hides behind meaningless patriotism as what my friend Takeiteasy is doing.

  • comment-avatar
    Kache Mhofu 9 years ago

    Nice piece articulating the Zimbabwean situation in a poignantly comic way. Reminds me of my literature classes. I’m afraid though that some “patriots” will not be amused!

  • comment-avatar
    masvukupete 9 years ago

    I think Takeiteasy should do just that, take it easy and slow. It is true there is so much drama in our country that is fit for a comic novel. Ministers try to solve fuel problems through spirit mediums. For all I know, spirit mediums are powerful in spiritual issues to give strength, courage, wisdom, and will power. I am still to find one that can create matter especially in its refined state. In the Glen View group we have people being detained for a year for being a friend of a suspected suspect. The person is detained in order to lure the suspect from hiding. We have a case that can be interpretted by a first grader as a no-brainer before it even starts, yet it takes a very very educated judge 2 whole years to figure this out. What is the point of our education if it can not be of use to our fellow men. Amongst our most richest people (avoiding wealthy intentionally) 1 or 2 can tell you what products they have produced for their own people. Whats the point really. Whats the point of having elections to appease the outsiders yet we do not care if our own people view the elections reservations. Shouldnt we be having elections for ourselves in order to improve ourselves. Tsvangirai leads a gang of over 1 million people (who voted for him) yet in all our reports its all about how SADC, AU and others have “endorsed” the elections and to hell with our own 1 million plus people who may be doubting the results. I hope to God (although very very pessimistic) that the “new” cabinet and “new” President will not have any excuses for non performance after 5 years. I hope after 5 years we shall look back and say surely the MDC was the problem now we know how our diamond money is being used for all of us. Maybe we other Zimbabweans have got it all wrong that we all belong to Zimbabwe. Maybe the spirits have chosen the real Zimbabweans and all we can do is eat the crumbs.

  • comment-avatar
    Chatunga 9 years ago

    When my time was up to grab the host nation’s citizenship i thought maybe its not the right tine since change is certain at home. I was wrong, its gettibg worse nd i followed my instincts nd ditched the greenback 2 years ago! Tobgai tione, garai ne chinyika chenyu chenzara ne tsvina ne rima!! Apawo morgan wacho akutourawo sa gushingo kurambira pachigaro!