Shed no tears for Jonathan Moyo

via We shed no tears for Jonathan Moyo | SW Radio Africa.   9 june 2014 by Tanonoka Joseph Whande

We cannot start laughing just because the circus convoy is streaming into town.

We have to wait for the delivery of the fun and the jokes; because jokes tickle us but we cannot laugh before they are delivered.

Hold your laughter, then!

Although the circus is still setting up tent, I cannot resist talking, not about the forthcoming show but about why the circus is being staged in front of animal rights activists.

The contradictions are fascinating.

Our nation is at the crossroads where it has been for years. We have problems.

Our Zimbabwe is ‘pretty bad’ – the oxymoron of politics, if you will.

While Robert Mugabe and Jonathan Moyo have been like peas in a pod, they are also oxymoronic fools who cannot rid each of the other.

Do not even bother to try to help; they do not deserve our attention.

Those who dare will find themselves marooned – that is if Mugabe outlives Jonathan Moyo and he is well determined to do just that.

For decades, Mugabe has been burying octogenarians younger and older than himself.

Our Lord is funny; very funny. When our kids die, we console ourselves by saying that the good die young. And we actually believe that.

But when those who murder our kids do not die, we are at a loss as to who we should applaud or complain to.

Yes, our Lord is funny.

We have always believed that the captain of the ship has always been expected to be the last one to leave the sinking ship.

I do not think Mugabe ever got on the ship. After all, several tragedies in recent years have proved to us that he has been the saboteur and not the savior just like our pilots and sea captains have been the ones to abandon ship before their passengers did…because, like Mugabe, they have advance information that fools on board do not have.

You see, the captain of the ship knows when Armageddon has arrived and he gets a head start on all of us.

Mugabe is not a fool. It is his circus coming into town to please but he knows when the lions, tigers and snakes will escape.

Only at funerals, do we gather to cry and shed tears. Where else do we do the same?

Zimbabweans always gather, sing and dance at funerals.

Zimbabweans laugh, sing and cry at funerals. As we mourn, we celebrate not the death but the life of the one departed.

The circus is streaming into town. Let us hold our laughter until the jokes start raining.

The performers are tired, hungry and angry.

We are faced with an oxymoronic couple here: Robert Mugabe and Jonathan Moyo.

Is it not interesting that ‘Monday Morning Quarterbacks’, like Jonathan Moyo, sprinted over the long-time ZANU-PF coaches?

Oh, yes, he did! And the owner of the club knew and often times applauded.
Jonathan Moyo scored goals for Mugabe.

The people of Zimbabwe, being the opposing team, were left shell-shocked.

When ZANU-PF was relegated, Jonathan Moyo was not on the coaching bench because he was fighting for his own survival when the players did not want him anymore.

“What shall I do, then, with the one you call the king of the media?”

“Crucify him!” voters in Tsholotsho said and Moyo lost his parliamentary seat.

But, to the amazement of the people, Mugabe jumped in and saved him.

Mugabe fished Jonathan Moyo out of the dungeons of defeat and, once again, made him a cabinet minister responsible for the same ministry that castrated the media on behalf of Mugabe.

I have no sympathy for Jonathan Moyo; none at all. And he knows why.

He is such an effective weapon for Mugabe that ZANU-PF has no one better than him. Rugare Gumbo is under the wraps and afraid to say things that might send him back into the wilderness where he languished for decades after independence.

Gumbo is part of that brave group of rebels who did not want Mugabe to lead the party in Mozambique. Thanks to the overrated Samora Machel, our history was diverted.

Two weeks ago, Alfred Mhanda (Dzinashe Machingura) died in distress because Robert Mugabe ensured that he would never get employed by anyone in Zimbabwe.

Mhanda stood firm on his opposition to Mugabe until he died. That is principle.

Principles are important but not to the likes of Jonathan Moyo and Rugare Gumbo.

Gumbo should have learned a lot from Mhanda’s death. After all, he was the only one from ZANU-PF who attended Mhanda’s burial while those who had nothing to do with ZANU’s formation, like Robert Mugabe, were not in attendance.

Shamuyarira, a political prostitute who jumped from one party to another, even forming his own FROLIZI party in the face of ZANU, was declared a national hero.

What did Nathan Shamuyarira do to warrant his hero status? All Shamuyarira did was offer Mugabe an opportunity to spout filth and insult people. What does this shrine mean and to who? Apart from being ZANU-PF, it is also a tribal place of rest.

The heart of the matter is that Jonathan Moyo deserves no sympathy at all. He prostituted himself on both sides of the political divide and got nowhere.

He abused the citizens and instigated the adoption of repressive laws that the nation continues to suffer under.

He messed up the media and narrowed the area of operation for journalists.

I see no positive contribution by Jonathan Moyo except for causing misery.

He fell, rose and fell again only getting up with help from a political sympathizer who has, once again, verbally attacked him.

He stands untrusted nationwide and those who hoped to benefit from his bare-knuckle approach to politics find themselves in a quandary. Poor Emerson Mnangagwa.

We used to cheer as Jonathan Moyo espoused the anger from within ourselves but we soon found out that he has misplaced ambitions and it is that which kills him.

Yes, he might rise again but if he does, Zimbabwe will only have itself to blame.

The rubbish that Mugabe spouted about Nathan Shamuyarira should be discounted because there is no one who has ever assisted the growth and independence of the media in Zimbabwe. Being praised by Mugabe is an indication that Shamuyarira was on the wrong side. Unfortunately for Jonathan Moyo, being denounced by Mugabe was an indication of how much of a destabilising individual Jonathan Moyo is.

Moyo can sing all he wants but he will find little sympathy among us. He enjoyed being used and got carried away by being used.

Because of Moyo, people like Cesar Zvayi are actually believed to be MDC sympathisers. How ungrateful the old goat is. Zvayi went through hell on behalf of ZANU-PF.

Mugabe is off his rocker just like Jonathan Moyo.

I shed no tears over Moyo because his demise is good for the media in Zimbabwe.

It is my hope that Moyo has reached his political apex and is going downhill never to climb back up again because he has done a lot of disservice to Zimbabwe.

It is unfortunate that Mugabe lied about Shamuyarira but told the truth about Jonathan Moyo…a truth that we all knew.

Maybe Jonathan Moyo should have fired Mugabe a long time ago; now he has been beaten to it and I bet Mnangagwa is crying his eye-balls red.

Robert Mugabe and Jonathan Moyo are clowns in the circus and the jokes are not funny.

I am Tanonoka Joseph Whande and that, my fellow Zimbabweans, is the way it is today, Monday, June 9th, 2014.



  • comment-avatar
    Roving Ambassador 8 years ago

    I for one is enjoying the circus now .Tomorrow is another day. Mujuru 1, Mnangagwa Zero.
    The game is on.

  • comment-avatar

    I never begrudge anyone who has something to celebrate, celebrating that something. I guess Zimbabwean will always celebrate any apparent downfall of their nemesis and Jonathan Moyo fits the bill. But let me hasten to say that whatever celebration each and everyone of us may feel deserving we should never again allow any euphoria to blind side us. To me, Jonathan Moyo and Mugabe are now inconsequential to my political input for the future of Zimbabwe. I consider them as trash of history which is just waiting to be picked up. I don’t celebrate their apparent or possible “downfall” because they are not relevant to the future of Zimbabwe and they are not worth any celebratory interlude to my very busy itinerary of how I am impacting the future of Zimbabwe right now. I am not waiting for their downfall, but am busy telling and encouraging everyone who truly looks forward to a free Zimbabwe to make his mark now irrespective of these politicians. The point is if we allow another oppressive regime to succeed Mugabe the fault will squarely be on our shoulders. The fall or not of Moyo and the death of Mugabe is not incidental to freedom. There are other vultures waiting and it’s all up to us to make sure that they will not take over, Moyo’s relevance or not notwithstanding.

  • comment-avatar

    that’s where the average loose it.bringing yo enemies closer to u has rewarded Bob with three decades of misrule.Tekere,Dabengwa,Gumbo,Nkala,Mavhaire,Jonso Nkomo and many more are known enemies of Bob bt what did he do.Can someone pliz bring Jonso home and use him a bit then dump him like the rest?

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    Noleen 8 years ago

    Who on earth can ever sympathize with Moyo when Zimbabweans have suffered so long because of him. He is just an opportunist with selfish motives. Now that ZANU is sinking then he thinks of infiltrating the opposition and support Biti promising to use propaganda as minister of information. He is very evil and selfish as long as arikudya achiguta nxa!

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    Chaka 8 years ago

    Pati I second u, we fellow Zimbos can make the difference for better or for worse. Each fellow Zimbo should start now (today) to do the right thing for the liberation of his countryman. We have suffered long enough. Together we can liberate ourselves

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    mutongi gava 8 years ago

    The game us not over until its the circus

  • comment-avatar
    ttaps3 8 years ago

    Past transgressions excepted, Jonathan Moyo is the only person who shed some light into ZANU PF and the malfeasance of the ruling party and the administrative arm of government. In the absence of any opposition, I mean a non corrupt opposition, reforming the ruling party, ZANU PF, is one of the possible options. Silencing Jonso now returns us to business as usual. Moyo may have other motivations, plans and plots but let us give him his due respect for tackling corruption. To the devil his due. Shamuyarira did notstand in the way of Willogate.
    ZANU PF’s survival depends on reformists despite their retrospective persuasions or omissions. In the cycle of time, who is more important to the future of ZANU PF, Zimbabwe and the populace– a young man trying to steer a sinking ship or an old captain, octogenarian being whipped out by the winds of time. Whom do you think will remain standing, fate being equal- Jonathan or Didymus and his boss Robert. The future belongs to Jonathan and his age. ZANU PF’s survival is with Moyo and his kind. Instead of celebrating the empty machinations of corrupt politicians, be they vice presidents or secretary of administration, we should cheer, we must cheer, we do cheer the positive vibes from Moyo. If you silence Moyo then what– the corrupt are scot- free. The leadership can hardly condemn the gross iniquities that Jonathan exposed. How long can it be business as usual? How long can this boat wither the social and economic storms without a captain at the helm? How come the same rush to sanction and punish people like Moyo is not used in equal measure to punish the ZANU PF appointees who are suffocating the country. What is bigger the destruction of ZANU PF or the total demise of the whole Country, Zimbabwe? Is being patriotic being ZANU or is it being a faithful Zimbabwean? Is allegiance to a political party greater than allegiance to Zimbabwe?

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    Reverend 8 years ago

    Sorry folks but I wasted some good time reading this mumbo jumbo and to the point of blasphemous article by T. J. Whande who may be deranged like those he writes about.Was he trying to be funny?

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    Mdidi 8 years ago

    “Jonathan ndodana yami ungayekeli vangeli” Tshiyana lezinto zamashona bakithi. Yekela babuse babulalane bodwa. Go back to South Africa and continue with your academic profession. Look at you now, uyinhlekisa. Shame bakithi.

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    Kevin Watson 8 years ago

    Mdidi, he cannot go back to South Africa and resume his academic career. The reason is that he defrauded Witwatersrand University of grant money. He cannot go back to Kenya either because he defrauded the Ford Foundation of grant money. The reason why he fell in with ZANU PF was so he could get a diplomatic passport rendering him safe from arrest in those countries and the USA where the Ford Foundation is based. He could also face arrest in all countries where the USA has extradition treaties or can lean on the government like Switzerland.

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    open eye 8 years ago

    “Our Lord is funny; very funny…”
    “Yes, our Lord is funny.”

    I urge you to read Galatians 6 verse 7. I cannot say anything about your faith but the Lord that I serve is not “funny” and I urge your to consider this seriously.

    • comment-avatar
      Tanonoka Joseph Whande 8 years ago

      Open Eye, your point, although made out of misunderstanding the play on words, is taken well. I am a devout Christian and never intended for anyone to think I was belittling our Lord. Point taken, though. Thanks.

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    reason 8 years ago

    This idiot by the name hwande/whande watever it is, never ceases to amuse, he writes on behalf of a goblin by the name Tsvancry who wasted the electorate’s time and energy by standing up to Mugabe only to manifest his puppet role. Jonso knows what is right for zimbabweans and he has been trying from inside and outside, he is a hope of light to those who can understand the dynamic of zim politics. Only idiots will hate him.

    • comment-avatar
      Tanonoka Joseph Whande 8 years ago

      Reason, is it not funny how your parents named you the opposite of what you are?

  • comment-avatar

    Re Joyce’Spillblood’ Mujuru and Emerson Mnangagwa –

    “It ain’t over till (or until) the fat lady sings”

    Joyce – keep the circus alive !

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    Isu Zvedu 8 years ago

    Isu zvedu, prefer to stay out of this nonsense coz Jonathan Moyo was simply asked to sweep evil under the carpet and see no evil and speak no evil. He will do just that. Meanwhile business as usual in the corrupt world headed by this Singapore visitor.

    I rest my case.