Mahumbwe everywhere you look

via Mahumbwe everywhere you look – Nehanda Radio Feb 16, 2014 By Chenai Chipikiri

It is now 200 days since the landmark election of 31 July 2013. Nothing material has happened to strengthen the economy and the only two upcoming economic events of note are the President’s birthday next week and his daughter’s wedding next month.

Money shall be made by a few lucky ones. And liquidity permitting, there will be a stampede, as the powerful and rich try to outdo each other in giving birthday and wedding presents in true Zimbabwean tradition.

Thereafter the next event will be the People’s Congress in December. As you can see, all the 2014 events in this beloved country are mahumbwe, (child’s play).

Such is the state of the Nation called Zimbabwe. It is mahumbwe to expect anything from a 90 year old. A 90 year old is a child who needs to be cared for, not to lead a nation. The Constitution needs to provide, not only for term limits but, age limits for those who aspire to the highest office.

The Constitution also needs to insist that only those individuals who have demonstrated a democratic disposition, should be allowed to assume the office of president. It is hard to imagine that someone who has been the leader of a party for 40 years is democratic.

Come on, who are you fooling? It is harder still, to believe that those who have lived under the same dictatorship will do any better. On this basis anyone who dreams that Zimbabwe will be any better when either of the factional leaders in the ruling party takes over, is naïve and involved in mahumbwe politics.

Now turning to the opposition, it is evident that plenty of mahumbwe is going on too. I will restrict my analysis to the main opposition party, as all the other ones are patently, projects and extensions of the ruling party. Zimbabweans are not daft, and have rejected the projects represented by MDC-N, Mavambo, MDC-99 and lately ZAPU.

The democratic credentials of the opposition will be evaluated in the form of five observations regarding current hot button issues.

My first observation about the MDC is that the violence that has erupted is undemocratic. It is the hallmark of ZANUPF. So why should the Zimbabwean voter reject one violent party only to replace it with another? This issue has been left unchecked for far too long and we have not heard anything substantive on the subject from the party leadership. Can the leaders in the MDC please stand.

My second observation is about Elton Mangoma and maybe he can answer the few questions I have. Why did he, write to Tsvangirai? My question really is about why he, Mangoma (Deputy Treasurer), and not somebody else, like the Chairman or the Secretary General?

By all means somebody should have asked Tsvangirai those tough questions, but I am just wondering if this shouldn’t have been procedurally brought up at a properly constituted meeting.

Could this be a sign that there is no democratic space in the party to discuss this heavy subject? You know where I am going with this, right? If succession cannot be discussed openly in the MDC so how are you different from ZANU(PF)?

My third observation is about Elton Mangoma and Tendai Biti, the two men who represented the opposition party at the negotiating table. My question is, are you sure this was the best product you could come up with? I am of course talking about the New Constitution. I can’t see the checks and balances in that document.

If you guys, the experts on Constitutional Law could let that happen, why should we exonerate you from culpability regarding the July 31 defeat? The 31 July defeat was authored on 16 March 2013 when the Referendum results were accepted by all. You two gentlemen sealed the fate of the MDC. Mahumbwe!

My fourth observation is about Tendai Biti and the Gono side show. Tendai owes an explanation to many stakeholders. What Kereke has revealed is just but the tip of the iceberg. Gono is just going to argue that everything he did was above board and was authorized by his principals.

After all, these matters would be covered under Cabinet Secrecy, the same Cabinet that presided over the devastation of many livelihoods.

Gono is a hero to the establishment because he showed them how to loot without leaving audit trail. He made them survive. It was never about Zimbabwe’s survival. When these guys talk about Zimbabwe and sovereignty, they are only talking about their divine right to rule.

Gono is now a fabulously rich guy and I am sure Tendai will be or has already been richly rewarded. My question Tendai, is where is your judgment? You are the guy who is going to argue the above arguments, the very arguments that undermine what the MDC supposedly stands for.

So, you are defending the man who, single handedly, destroyed the livelihoods of millions of Zimbabweans, most of them, the very voters whom you are courting. This man makes Cuthbert Dube’s scandal mahumbwe. And there you are, the Secretary General of the MDC! You want us to take you seriously? Just who are you kidding?

Somebody needs to answer some tough questions here. Look in the mirror Tendai and tell us when the conversion happened. You know what I mean don’t you? I am talking about the conversion from “Gono is a terrorist” to “Gono is a patriot”. Something happened there! We know Gono’s games Tendai and we suspect, we conjecture, we guess, we guesstimate, we assume and unless you convince us to the contrary, that you are terribly compromised.

Word on the street is it is you who is pushing for Tsvangirai to step down. If it is true, you are quite within your rights to do so, but bring it up in the open. But also clear the air about the Gono affair. And whilst at it also admit your strategic blunders in the Constitutional Reform process that landed us with this poor constitution.

My last observation for today goes to the opposition in general. Where the heck are you? You guys are sleeping on the job and deserve to be fired even before being hired! The Salary-Gate scandal should have been fodder for you to decimate the ruling party, but you guys are busy appealing to join the gravy train via GNU 2!

Would you guys have known what to do had you been given the keys to Statehouse and Munhumutapa Buildings on 31 July 2013? I doubt.  Whilst ZANU(PF) dubbed the last election “Bhora Mugedhi”, you guys have just been handed a penalty kick with no goalkeeper between the posts and what do you do…… It’s Mahumbwe after Mahumbwe.

Chenai Chipikiri is an independent voter and analyst and can be contacted on



  • comment-avatar
    roving ambassador. 8 years ago

    I like you man. you said it as it is. MDCs are no hopers. Zanu is the devil incarnate.

    • comment-avatar
      Mafuta 8 years ago

      I read a lot of discernment by observant Zimbabweans that ZANU and unnamed specific leadership is/are the devil’s and I agree, but has anyone put into play a national exorcism, starting with ordinary unimportant everyday, unknown families, and working up to the notables? Spiritual warfare will bring the evil crashing down.

  • comment-avatar

    Chenai Chipikiri I wonder what your answers are. The truth of the matter is that there are some with the view better the the Devil you know. I say no. We have known this Devil for 34 years. 34 years of suffering. I say CHINJA. I am not an MDC supporter by chioce but I acknowledge that they tried to bring about change. At the moment they are the best bet. I only hope your comments are to keep them in check rather than to try and make Zanu look a better option. They are not. They need to go. Zunde needs to show themselves and take a hold of the devil and give him a good shake. Simba Makoni needs to reinvent himself. Zapu needs to look at prospective partners to make them relevant.”Would you guys have known what to do had you been given the keys to Statehouse” he says. We will never know because of an election STOLEN AGAIN.

  • comment-avatar
    John Thomas 8 years ago

    Anybody would be better than ZANU. MDC for all it’s faults would fit that bill. We are so deep in the brown stuff that there are no longer any easy ways out. A restoration of relations with the IMF, world bank and the west is the only way. These parties would then make sure the government sticks to less damaging policies as they do in Zambia and Mozambique.

  • comment-avatar
    CHINDUNDUMA 8 years ago

    Chenai Chipikiri as to your question “Would you guys have known what to do had you been given the keys to State House” you have already alluded to the dilemma Zanu Pf currently finds itself in and one wonders whether the MDC could have been worse off. Zanu Pf got keys to State House in 1980 and the results are all there for everyone to see. Destruction of the jewel of Africa and it will take generations to develop Zimbabwe to the 1980 level. Pasi na Mugabe

    • comment-avatar

      This is why I love this website. John Thomas and CHINDUNDUMA wisdom from the people of various opinions(povo) You guys have my respect for ever.

  • comment-avatar

    CHINDUNDUMA brother I have never heard it said better. This to me shows that there is hope for our beloved country and of cause there is life after death for Zimbabwe.

  • comment-avatar

    It is well known that armchair pseudo academics like Hutu zunde don’t want zanupf to face prosecution. Yet the vast majority of the povo real zimbos want harsh justice so that we will never ever have blatant criminals destroying our beautiful but ruined country.

  • comment-avatar
    Godfrey C 8 years ago

    Couldn’t have said it better, ese mahumbwe chete chete. Tsangirai is a bigger joke that I ever imagined. Zim is cursed vakomana.

  • comment-avatar
    easily fooled 8 years ago

    Chipikiri, is it Mr Nail? Its in interesting read, but learn to think outside the box man. Why do you expect much from MDC-T without giving your hand as either an ordinary member or a zimbabwean who seeks liberty and fairness? Are you saying you MDC is not doing good enough to set you free while you opt to be lousy, writing articles discouraging the movement sounding to be a spy from politiburo? Are you sure you are worried about the status quo? What have you done, as an individual. Simba Makoni of Mavambo dissociated himself from Zanu pf calling them a group of thugs. Dabengwa did the same. What have you done. A group of inactive retired war vets says we can ZUNDE up the undemocratic regime. What have you done to add value to the fight for change.

    Its not about writing, if you are not yet there, shut up, or write about soccer. We know what happened to the new consititution, we know how MDC has been infiltrated by C10s, undercover ZPF operatives to cause chaos. MDC as a party has never condoned violance.

    Ita chipikiri chiri useful. We dont want to be easily fooled by zpf operatives operating under cover

  • comment-avatar
    Mthwakazi 8 years ago

    Shona tribalism and gukurahundism is the cause of all this you are crying about.

    Stop the noise and get over with gukurahundism, tribalism and racism. Everything will then fall into place!!

    • comment-avatar
      Mpurwa 8 years ago

      Mthwakazi your struggle is a pie in the air,pack you bags and go South we do not need your views here

      • comment-avatar
        Mukanya 8 years ago

        Mpurwa do not worry. Mthwakazi already lives in South Africa. Do not take him seriously. Commenting on his contributions is a waste of time and effort. Murwere wepfungwa. Haikona kubatikana nemipengo nekuti vanhu havazooni musiyano.

      • comment-avatar
        Mthwakazi 8 years ago

        What struggle are you talking about? I have no struggle; I am not in a struggle – what then is this struggle you are talking about?

        I have never voted for gukurahundi Mugabe in my life; and I have never voted for Tswangirayi either. To me both are just the same Shona tribalists; its not my business or responsibility to remove them and I dont care what happens to the Republic of Gukurahundi – so, what struggle are you on about?

    • comment-avatar
      chirasha 8 years ago

      you are the one who is tribalistic

  • comment-avatar
    Tongoona 8 years ago

    It is time that Zimbabweans become focused on removing ZANU PF from the helm, in other words regime change. They are good at mutserendende (down the slope slide). Smith left an over sound economy but today the economy is mutserendende to a zero economy, mutserendende to economic destruction, mutserendende to corruption, mutserendende to disrespect of human rights and rule of law, mutserendende to lawlessness, mutserendende to mvengemvenge danzi remakonzo and mutserendende to lack of democracy.

  • comment-avatar
    Wilbert Mukori 8 years ago

    The mahumbwe parallel is spot on except for one thing the whole nation is starving and the child, Mugabe, is wasting the little maize meal cooking a meal that will give the hungry nation diarrhoea. Sadza mbodza rinoitisa manyoka!

  • comment-avatar

    Tribalism stinks!!

  • comment-avatar

    Great betrayal by Zim opposition , hw can dey fight to destroy di party instead of taking advantage of di salarygate scandal. Greedy politicians who are not patriotic .These gyz are only fighting to get into power n nothin more.

  • comment-avatar

    As I see it the MDC has not failed.It is at this point when genuine movements emerge stronger .Remember ZANU PF leaders had to be arreste in Zambia when Kaunda saw it beyond doubt that they had killed Chitepo.Up to now no one in ZANU wants to talk about why they were arrested by Kaunda.People must not lose hope, not at all.ZANU PF knows two things, elections and looting.Now they waste time talking about Tsvangirai.Brothers and sisters, this time was supposed to be a monitoring and evaluation stage when all successes and failures were looked into after ZANU ‘s resounding victory.People must know that the opposition is heavily dependent on urban electorate,which is now heavily victimised by Chombo .Its easy for the MDC to regain majority in Parliament.Come 2018,it must declare Matebeleland N and South its territory, Bulawayo,Harare,Midlands, Manicaland and it must gain Masving Province.Leave ZANU PF doing its mahumbwe ,I can see elections soon because all is going to stop.While the top six have yet to apologise to the masses for the loss,they must start restructuring grassroots.Dont even dream of Zunde , a social gathering of opaque beer drinkers in Hillbrow