Women Live Quietly In The Hearts Of Those They Left Behind

It’s not like Grama is planning to die or anything– she is not even that old. Well, she is definitely old, she is seventy– but in lots of ways she seems younger than my mother. Probably because she does not have as much to worry about as my mom does. She is past a lot of it.

I tell Grandma it is creepy to read obituaries, but she says it is no more creepy than going to church. It makes her think about what really matters, she says. I say obituaries are not just creepy, they are dull. Mostly lists of jobs and titles and awards and survivors, and who cares? What is the point? “That is the point”, she says. “All the things that seem important to people in the rat race seem pretty boring when printed out in the paper. A general hand gets a paragraph if he is lucky, a CEO gets a quarter of a page. Most women get nothing at all: 7 out of 9 obituaries are of men– it is like women do not die. Maybe they do not”, Grandma says. Maybe because they do not leave much of a paper trail in the world, they live quietly on in the hearts of those they leave behind.

Women have been making strides in all areas of life, but one thing that remains true is that they often go unnoticed when it comes to obituaries. This is a reflection of society at large, where women’s contributions are often marginalized or minimized. However, this does not mean that their impact is any less significant.

Women have been instrumental in shaping Zimbabwean history and society, from Mbuya Nehanda to The First Lady Auxillia Mnangagwa, and yet their stories often remain untold. This is why it is important to celebrate the accomplishments of women, not just in death, but in life as well.

It is important to recognize that women do not need to leave a paper trail to leave a lasting impact on the world. Women have been and continue to be caregivers, nurturers, and leaders in their families, workplaces, and communities. They often sacrifice their own ambitions and desires for the betterment of those around them.

As women, it is important to remember that your stories and legacies are just as important as those of us, your male counterparts. You should not wait for others to recognize your worth, but rather take charge of your own narratives and celebrate your accomplishments.

Obituaries may seem like a trivial matter, but they serve as a reflection of how we value and remember those who have passed on. Women have made significant contributions to society, and it is time for these contributions to be acknowledged and celebrated. Women do not need to leave a paper trail to be remembered, but we should not let society erase their stories and legacies.

Kumbirai Thierry Nhamo | 

Writer, Blogger, Poet and Researcher

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